important

I have raised my questions to the ceiling
from my little corner of the bed
many times before

why?
but why?
now what?
how?


funny
how a moment
an event
a time
a year
a day

a letter

something unexpected
that wasn't predicted
and definitely not what was anticipated

can change our life
become 'important' beyond measure
and leave an indelible mark
on our very beings
in some place that as of yet
had remained untouched
unknown


altering decisions
changing our course
closing doors

opening windows?!?!?

something that just seemed natural
automatic
a given
the next logical progression

something we assumed
without a doubt
but of course

and then a "no"

something other than all our hopes

and I plead
'but he so deserves this'
or
'she so doesn't deserve that'

but the One who ulimately holds the answers
looks at me
in the night

and in the silence

I begin again...
to trust
to wait
for the better thing which He has
for each of us

the next 'important' thing

and the morning...after
it's back to where it all began
back to the source of our comfort and hope
that which we do

automatically
but of course