Monday, September 14, 2009

the Feast of The Exaltation of the Cross

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26 years ago we stood at the feet of Jesus on the Cross
and married

My best friend from childhood, Diane Dubick's, husband sent us this photo many months later
it and one that he took of me and my dad have become my favorite wedding photos

This one by far over the years has just grown in meaning as we have grown up, grown in the Lord, and grown older

We have used it as our 'prop' many times when we have spoken to engaged couples about marriage
and even when talking to young people about purpose and vocation...

It hangs in the hallway that leads to our bedroom, with the photo of my husband and his mom, the one of me and my dad, the one of us kissing as we leave the church, and the score cards from our 500 rummy game that we began on our honeymoom........

Which photo will become the corner stone in my nephew and his new wife's home and life?!?
at the falls mosaic

A visitor to my blog, Rayne commented about how the things in our lives can reveal our emotion
This is one of those 'things'

It speaks to me about marriage
and the cross...the joy set before Him

about purpose and accomplishment

It speaks to me about surrender
about laying your life down for love of the other
and glory

The world we live in is complex
many things happen at the same time
many things cause us to remember things that happened in another place and time

I just called my supervisor at the hospital to tell him I would not be in today
because of family still being here from the wedding over the weekend
Right now in the hospital there are people in the ICU, and the CCU and the SCU
Families worried and afraid
thinking of nothing else, but their loved one in that bed

But today I'm with my family and thinking of my family...
Thinking of my husband down stairs...
My husband who will be by me all the days of my life
Who my someday be the one sitting by my bedside
worried and praying

I should be sitting down there having my coffee with him
Telling him that I'm sorry
that he is right, as always
that I am a jealous woman
and that I do feel threatened, more than I would like to admit

I thank God for the perfect work of My Lord Jesus Christ on the Cross
I look to it every weekend as they process up the aisle and His head moves by me
He sees me thru His closed eyes
now
as perfect
that selfish, jealous, scared little woman girl is forgiven
and loved
and able to love
because of that work

Maybe that was what brought Him His joy...of the cross
He knew we would now be holy
like Him
and not always operate out of that sad, lonely self

Why do we cry at weddings??!?

We hope...
Against hope that all will be well...we believe...and pray for the love that brings two people together
to endure
that the oneness they feel will remain
that their love will cause them not to ever hurt each other, even when they feel hurt
and alone
that they will have the strength to believe and cling and love all the days of their lives

And we who observe their committment know how quickly the days can speed by
and how long the days and nights
and life can be

and how precious each and every one is
every moment
of every day
and night
every life

I remember when we were first married
I remember my identity was discovered in this other person
my security was found in this other person

I have learned over these 26 years that my identity and security are found in another person
the person of Christ
My husband has always been the 'Christ' in my life
loving me perfectly
sacrificing for me continually
challanging me to perfection

but as we have grown in Christ together
Christ has assumed His proper place in our committment

my faith is now in Him
for my security
my identity
our marriage

without Him
it all would crumble


I cried at Shawn and Tessa's wedding because I was so happy to hear God being brought into it
in the gathering before him, in the readings...
was that for our benefit?!?
or do they really believe?!?
I don't know what they may feel right now, but I do know God hears that call
and will hear their many future calls...
just as He has heard ours

I look forward to seeing them grow in love and in faith
and His institution of marriage...and His gift of new life

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